... Video Wednesdays

I'm feeling kind of lazy today so thank goodness for video Wednesdays. I found this video of MC SpandX rapping about being a roadie and talking smack about hipsters which always provides some comic relief.



There has been some speculation as to whether Performance Bike secretly produced and distributed this video, though I don't really care. What I do care about is that MC SpandX is obviously ignorant of some of the finer points of both cycling and video-editing.

Firstly, during the chorus when he's lubin' his chain, he sprays his 'super loob' on the top run of the chain, which is incorrect (when lubricating a bicycle chain, always remember to apply oil to the bottom run to minimize the chance of oiling the braking surface of your rim and to flush grime toward the outside of the chain-links).

Also, he's wearing what appears to be the Australian National Champion Jersey, which annoys me.

As I mentioned earlier, I'm not usually inclined to critique one's style or manner of dress save egregious errors of wardrobe, but the widespread 'palping' of national or world champion markings 'rubs' me the wrong way.


Take note of the above rainbow pattern. This 'colorway' is reserved exclusively for use by people who have become a world champion in one cycling discipline or another (road race, TT, match sprint, etc...). Unfortunately, since most people on bikes are not racers (myself included, as of yet anyway) they are not subject to the stringent rules of USAC which would fine or disqualify a rider for misrepresenting him(or her)self as a national or world champion.


Similarly, national champions are accorded the honor of wearing their national jersey at races during the year of thier win, and may have all subsequent jerseys trimmed with that national 'colorway' for the rest of their career.

You may think that I'm going a little overboard by attacking the misappropriation of these 'colorways', but if everyone started wearing the rainbow jersey (and they have), it wouldn't hold any special significance for the few that actually earned it by being the absolute best cyclist in the world. I think it would be really exciting to see someone wearing the rainbow jersey and to know without a doubt that they're the best instead of wondering why they feel it necessary to masquerade as an ideal.

Unfortunately for my rigid principles, all sorts of cycling prody has become available with the rainbow trim. Helmets, pedals, rims, and caps alike have been emblazoned with it and risen accordingly in price (one noteable exception is with bicycles themselves. when a bike brand is ridden to victory by a world champ, the company is allowed to use the rainbow on frames of that year as is the case on all 2008-9 Specialized bikes, thanks to the likes of Paolo Bettini and Alessandro Ballan).

Little do these poseurs know, like salmon, those who don the rainbow jersey are a cursed population.

Then again, there have been much more brguiling trends amongst cyclists as evidenced by these strange handlebar grips forwarded to me by a reader:


Gives new meaning to screwing the guy next to you doesn't it?

...prunings and eye candy

• The Big Picture is an awesome photo-journalism arm of Boston.com where you can waste hours flipping through large format pictures of excellent composition on a smattering of subjects. My current favorite, of course: 2009 Tour de France. (forwarded by a reader)
  

• Sashae's Flickr photostream of cyclists and their bikes. It seems primed to become (gasp) another Cycle-Chic blog though of the fixed gear and grungy urban-chic, not the 'artistically' monochromed and leather saddled-chic to which we have become accustomed. (via Prolly)
  

• This prototype tail-light that paints colored lines on the road with lasers to help drivers be aware of clearances you require when they pass. I thought that this was just another product enabling hipsters to further customize their fixed-gear bikes until I saw this video. Considering that the lines don't fade under headlights and ambient light, I will definitely get one of these if they decide to make them in multiple 'colorways'. (via altitude)
  

• Students at MIT are developing batteries for electric cars that can be fully recharged in 10 minutes flat! Let's see if the government squashes this as quietly and efficiently as they did the EV1. (via Inhabitat)

• Using Wiimotes as tracking devices, Japanese researchers have figured out how to create touchable holograms utilizing a "phenomena called acoustic radiation pressure" to create sensations in a user's hand. I wonder how long it'll take for this to turn into hyper-realistic, interactive porn... (via physorg.com)

• The great hipster silk route has widened to accomodate a new watering hole in the form of Der Schwarze Kölner, a new beer garden that has just opened on Fulton and S. Oxford St. Considering they offer liter mugs, I may have to stop in tonight for a cold one or three. (via NYTimes: Ft. Greene/Clinton Hill blog)
  

...the weekend sanity (installment 7)

I really didn't do much of anything this weekend. My boss doesn't feel it's necessary to pay me on time anymore and the moohare was up in Boston, so I was at a loss for what to do with my scarce funds and ample free-time.

I joined a (different) few friends who were biking up to go camping on Bear Mountain on Saturday morning and accompanied them as far as Nyack, not wanting to get back to Brooklyn too late. I have to say one of the weirdest feelings I've felt recently was when I rode back through Manhattan on that Saturday night after having biked over a hundred miles to Bear Mountain and back. I've never felt so out of place as I did looking haggard and dripping sweat at traffic lights in the village, as perfumed young socialites and wannabe players strutted by.

The ride through New Jersey was the same as it always is, so I opted to forgo bringing the camera since it would just be a reiteration of previous posts. However, Instead of taking the Williamsburg bridge, as I had on past trips, we used the Manhattan Bridge and cut across Soho to the WSH. We rode from Bed-Stuy along Flushing toward Dumbo, passing the impound lot and turning onto Sands st.

The last time I rode on any of these streets, they were either in complete disrepair or under construction (which is frequently worse for cyclists than simply dealing with the crappy roads). For that reason, I usually commute from Prospect Heights, where I live, through downtown Brooklyn to access the bridges. That route has become a force-of-habit and my commute is getting to be a little stale; so to shake things up a bit, I took a fairly different route this morning in order to present this double-edition BLRI!!!!

As I do most every day, I rode Vanderbilt Avenue northbound after turning off of my picturesque, brownstone-lined slice of Brooklyn. I usually opt to use this avenue at the outset of most of my trips by bicycle because it boasts both well-maintained bike lanes and conscientious pedestrians. It should be noted, however, that the amicability of the locals and light traffic seem to breed salmon (especially of the sidewalk variety).

Despite the infestation of idiots, Vanderbilt is a great street to ride, especially given the new Brooklyn Bike and Board shop between Bergen and Dean which enjoys a steady flow of business from weekend warriors, displaced hipsters, and commuters alike (and which was the subject of a recent LBSR).


Continuing across Atlantic Avenue, the bike lane sadly disappears and one must forcefully seize a lane from the clutches of vile Livery cars. The road quality is dramatically lower than before despite passing through what is in my opinion, one of Brooklyn's most beautiful neighborhoods, Fort Greene.


While I'm no fan of Neo-Gothic 'Architecture,' I've always enjoyed having silly buildings (like this private school) in and around my neighborhood, if for no better reason than to have something to joke about. It's useful in the way those kitschy Urban Outfitters trinkets are; a springboard for sematic debates about the rediculousness of consumerism and the wayward souls who are comforted by it.

Continuing past the BQE toward the Brooklyn Navy Yard, I was surprised to see a motorcycle shop x vespa dealership collabo (I'll be damned, they're growing in popularity):


It is my opinion that while scooters are a more reasonable choice of transport in congested cities than cars are; their continued use of gasoline and the haughty sense of self-righteousness they foster in their owners are just plain bad for society. (OK, I started to go off on a tangent about how much scooter-ers bug me, so I'm gonna reserve that for a later post).

After passing the police impound lot on Navy St, I turned onto Sands St. which has been wonderfully re-designed as the most bicycle conscious street NYC has presented me with! For that reason, this street will hold top-slot as the only A+ I will ever issue (unless if course this becomes the norm and then there's just no point in continuing the BLRI except to bitch).


I can't believe we actually have this kind of bike lane in Brooklyn! These are without a doubt the best kind (I bet Arup designed it)! As far as I know (and I bike a lot) this is the first of it's kind in NYC, as it is a noticeably brand-spankin'-new iteration of what has been done for years in places like Copenhagen.

Sands St., though a measly two blocks in length, has been transformed into what is arguably the best solution for cyclist - motorist altercations. Notice how the bike lanes are separated by a median and are located at the center of the road instead of in the door-swing range of parked cars. Also note (if you can) that the bike lanes, median, and stripey area are elevated about 6 inches above the car's lane. This is exactly what needs to be done with all streets to quell the incessant bickering between cabbies (who of course need to drop off and pick up passengers somewhere) and the cyclists they routinely cut off.

Unfortunately, most streets here are one way (despite what one would gather from the bourgoning salmon population) and despite its simplicity, this method of bike-lane separation may not work everywhere.

Continuing over the bridge and up through the city along my usual route, I decided that in the day's spirit of new routes, I'd try to ride up Park Ave instead of turning on 13th and taking 6th Ave as I normally would. I had tried this the very first day I commuted to work by bike and didn't have the grapes to try it again, though I was much less experienced with cycling in Manhattan at that point.

Now that I'm a bona-fide city cyclist, Park Avenue seemed like a walk in the park compared to 6th Ave (which you'll remember was recently awarded the BLRI rating of F), despite not having any bicycle designations or markings.

I think as long as you're comfortable riding between cars at around 20 mph Park Ave is definitely safer than using the 'bike lane' on 6th or the dumb separated paths on 8th or 10th. Speaking of which, has anyone else noticed that there are virtually no good bike-paths to take you downtown?

Until next time friends, mind the traffic.